I feel like I am FREEZING! It's just so cold. Like, seriously cold here in Kansas City. I mean when there are words out there to describe our weather that are "Polar Vortex" and "Arctic Freeze" that's just too stinkin' cold for this girl! I truly hate being cold. I mean I despise being cold. I was born in Arlington, TX but spent most of my life growing up in Iowa, where the cold can feel like it's freezing your inner being. So, this cold is not my first rodeo, it's just not my favorite! I don't do well in the Winter, I get seasonally depressed and have a hard time keeping my psyche in a good place. I have been clinging desperately to God and the encouragement that a life lived for him brings. Even though I have days where I literally get 3 hours of sleep, because I have a 7 month old and 2 year old that never sleep, I have been provided for. I pray, I pray all the time now. Lord, intercede. Lord, provide what I need today. Lord, I pray for energy. Lord, give me peace. Lord, give me comfort. Father, you are so good to me, thank you for your provision. These are my prayers, daily. I wondered this week, who I would be if God had not worked in my heart. So many times in the Winters past my heart would freeze. I would shut people out and be frozen until the Spring would melt away my sadness. This Winter my heart is warm, even through the hard times His word is what I can cling to:
Matthew 13:15
For this people's heart has become calloused; they hardly hear with their ears, and they have closed their eyes. Otherwise they might see with their eyes, hear with their ears, understand with their hearts and turn, and I would heal them.
AND I WOULD HEAL THEM, this is beautiful. Is your heart freezing this Winter? Is it calloused? There are so many of us hurting. Maybe you have someone you just can't forgive and that has left your heart wounded and bruised. You may be thinking about a divorce because you just can't love him one more day, he has turned you into ice. What about that deep secret that you hold in your heart that leaves you frozen in this stage of life. There are so many hurts, so much coldness in this world. How do you break through the ice? Where can you get heat from the inside out? I started with prayer. Lord, please be the ruler of my life, take these burdens and heal me. Then to the word, then to the house. Migrate, run do not walk, seek refuge in the house of the Lord. Plug in friends, be with the rest of us struggling to survive and live free. There's a group of us that meet together once or twice a week. We share burdens, we share love, we support, we pray, we praise we pray. We meet Sunday mornings all throughout your city.
If you're ready to heal, to be warm, to thaw out and fill up start your journey in prayer and you will be lead to your next step. Don't have a frozen heart to go along with the polar vortex around you. God made you beautiful, wonderful and fearful. He is waiting to be in relationship with you. To warm you with his love and share in your journey.
Please let me know if I can help you navigate through this. If you're close to me you are welcome to join us Sunday morning at Providence Baptist Church in KC. We're just a bunch of wounded soldiers navigating the daily war. Sending out to all of you warmth and love through the pages of this blog. I pray for you daily! Until we talk again, remember my gorgeous friends you are Beautifully, Wonderfully and Fearfully Made in his AMAZING image.
Much Love,
Chrystan
